They brought me sugarcane to keep me mum
I can’t have sugar, have you SEEN my bum?
They tried to coax me to nibble that stick
It tickled my nose, and they ran double quick
The tents shook, it was so loud, but Jeez!
You gotta sneeze when you gotta sneeze
My sweetheart wanted me to pick her lice
Women! Years of grooming won’t suffice!
She talked and talked and talked some more
I’m not her audience, to cry “Encore!”
Then she spotted them creeping slowly near
and eagerly shrieked to invite them to hear!
They crept upon me in the dead of the night
Sure I was too sleepy to put up a fight
An arm ventured in to open the cage door
It was pulled out, but the hand was no more
I’m quite upset they never came back
It’s a rare treat for me: a midnight snack
Many animals died in the fire at the Russian Circus yesterday. Here's wishing that animal circuses, like honesty and chivalry, are consigned to fiction forever.